daisuke "50 shades of identity crisis" niwa (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
sketchythief) wrote2017-09-05 10:23 am
sketchythief) wrote2017-09-05 10:23 am
overflow post
a letter to my future self:
do not make bad decisions to offset bad luck
a letter to my future self:
do not make bad decisions to offset bad luck
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you shouldnt have to be sorry! actually i thought that was really admirable... im sure people would look up to you
im doing mostly okay! its harder to process for me so ill let it sit for a week or so...
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that's a good idea. if you need any clarifications, help, or just wish to vent to someone about all of this, i'd be happy to offer my services.
i'm hardly an expert -- that would be those unfortunate enough to have been on the app for the better part of the year -- but i'll do my best.
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though i do have a question
what do you think about the people who say "it cant be helped" when turning into what they were before?
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well, this is just my opinion, and i'm aware it's a very harsh one...
but i believe them to be weak-willed.
to become that person is to choose to become that person. actions are what define humans, as they always have. you can always choose to fall back on a memory and pick the same choice, knowing the potential outcome, or you can choose to make a different one.
i suppose, then, it depends on the type of person saying things like "it can't be helped."
if they were a person who did plenty of good things in their other life, perhaps it isn't so bad, but i doubt they'll ever be able to completely become the other them. after all, even if our lives were fake, they were still our lives. they still shaped us and gave us different perspectives from what our other selves had.
if they were a person who did plenty of bad things in their other life, then it's just an excuse. "i can't help hurting people because this is how it was before" is a lie, and a cruel one, to themselves and to those who have come to cherish them, to those who have been hurt by them, and so on and so forth.
there is nothing wrong in emulating some aspects of our past lives, i suppose, particularly if there are things you like about the other you, and that you wish to strive for -- use them as betterment, if you will.
but saying "it can't be helped" is so
frustrating
because it can be. in so many stories humans are given free will, the ability to consider things for themselves, the choice to be kind or be cruel, and to simply toss aside all of that makes me quite unspeakably angry.
...this got long again. my apologies.
again though, this is only my opinion, and i won't ask anyone to share it. i'm aware it may be harder for some than others, depending on how they've grown up, but...
well, there's nothing i can say that won't simply cycle into my rant from before.
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i think i can understand your viewpoint... i agree with it too. i dont want it to be "it cant be helped" to become someone i dont want to be either
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did you have anyone in mind when you asked though? hearing that there's always a choice to be made may encourage them out of that sort of mindset, if so.
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something like that
but i guess its more like um... someone i know might remember something really traumatic down the road and im not sure what i can do to help him when it comes
[ because obviously this friend of his matters more than himself, even if he's also going through the same thing ]
it feels frustrating knowing that i cant do anything about it...
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the best thing you can do is be there for him.
whether it's being firm with him, or being reassuring, or buying him pizza and eating it with him on the floor on his bathroom... you simply need to be there.
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were you ever in that position too?
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[ hahahaaa. ]
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so... a little bit!
but its okay if you dont want to answer, since its a bit personal
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at the very least, we've agreed to be a little more open with each other, so with luck if he should have trouble in the future, he won't keep it to himself or do something incredibly stupid again.
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is that a recurring theme...
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it's a theme that plagues the best of us, i'm afraid.
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anyway thanks for answering my questions! even if they were pretty personal... i really appreciate it
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[ she didn't even get into names and specifics, so it's fine. vague details are fine. and a chance to share her opinion, to try and help someone... is a good chance to have. ]